REVIEWS:

From Joseph:

I went to the Fiona Apple show at the Orpheum in Memphis last night. It was my first visit to the Orpheum, and it's really beautiful theatre with good acoustics. The Eels were to open, but it was only E playing some a acoustic and piano numbers, mostly off of the new album. Even though the Eels have lots of instruments on their record, E pulled it off without drums. He is a talented musician. My favorite was "Novocaine for the Soul," which he strummed very fast. It kind of had a Latin rhythm to it. He closed by covering a song that everybody's familiar with. I can't think of the name of it, but the first words are "Wise men say only fools rush in but I can't help falling in love with you." The radio DJ who was announcing the event later came out and ignorantly called him "Eel." Most of the crowd had never heard an Eels record, I don't believe. Fiona came out a little bit past 9 to thunderous applause. She, after playing a couple of songs mentioned that the theatre wasn't sold out, which she attributed to her refusal to do press on this tour, and that she realize that the fans there were there about the music and so to her it was a VIP Private Party. Everybody liked that. She seemed kind of hoarse, and had some water or nasal spray or something up there. She was sick I could tell, but it didn't show in her performance. She pretty much stayed true to previous setlists. She gave so much energy, and we returned it. By the end, she was pleased with the volume of the crowd and said that we were great. My favorites were 'Fast As You Can' and her 2nd encore song 'Kissing My Love' which is very funky, and utilized Lucky's wah wah to a nice extent. It was a great show all in all, ending about 10:30.

From Ashley:

Fiona's presence tonight was nothing short of godly.  She graced the stage with an amazing aura unlike any I have ever seen.  After a marvelous opening, Fiona addressed the audience stating "we haven't sold out tonight, because we didn't publicize this concert, so the people who are here are here for the music, like a vip party for Fiona fans."  How heartfelt!  After this Fiona sang her heart out and tossed in a few random add libs.  Fiona's glowing beauty was stunning throughout the entire show.  For the encore she sang the most wonderful version of  "Just one of those things" followed but a soulful, splendid version of "kissing my love".  Upon departing from Fiona's grand presence, and without a doubt the most amazing show I have ever witnessed, I was lucky enough to receive an autograph from the wonderful Fiona.  This night I was definitely able to touch heaven.  Fiona has wings-indeed!

Ashley Megan

Hello Fiona Fans,
I have got a story for you. Yes, I had a brief encounter with the amazing songwriter/singer herself! I shall write this story in screenplay form, some of it at least. First, before I begin I am a huge Fiona/Paul Thomas Anderson fan. My little sister Whitney (12), loves Fiona's music, so I took her to the concert with me. That's all you need to know, except that the concert kicked ass, you see my story begins after the concert. Fiona played every song off the new album, plus 3 from the first. The encore on the other hand, included two covers, I think. One was an old recording that she sang to, I am guessing its title was "Just One of Those Days." The other song in the encore was a boogie down, groovin' kinda song, called (i think) "When I'm Kissing My Lover." Anyways, here is the story entitled, I ALMOST FAINTED. By Josh the Yodafool (19 years old, male)

I ALMOST FAINTED

INT: NIGHT/BEALE STREET/STAGE DOOR/MEMPHIS, TN/
APRIL 10, 2000

In front of two tour buses 20 or so teens await a mega star. These die hard fans have pens ready and can't wait to see the object of their affection, Ms. Fiona Apple.  Josh (19) and Whitney (12), two big fans, await with different hopes. They have two copies of a letter written especially for Ms. Apple and Mr. Paul Thomas Anderson. Two copies, just in case one of them is thrown away by some stage hand. The band walks out with some cheering, but the anticipation builds for the young fans.  They have all waited an hour and forty-five minutes.  Finally at last the Stage Door opens, a security guard (6 ft. 3) leads Ms. Fiona Apple out into the sidewalk near her tour buses. 

Fiona is wrapped up in a coat, she is soaked to the bone. She looks terrified or scared. Josh's camera is recording! (After reviewing the tape, Josh finds that Fiona looked straight into the RCA video camera and asks her guard to tell Josh to turn it off, but the dumb security guard doesn't listen) Fiona (who happens to be around 5 ft. 5, short compared to her protection) forgets the camera and begins to sign autographs. The females in the audience are going crazy, flashes from camera bulbs are flowing rapidly.  

Soon the craziness ends, but the autograph signing continues. Whitney holds one copy of the letter. Whitney is only 4 ft. 9, so Fiona can't see her too well, but she sees the letter, and takes it.
FIONA
(holding the letter, and looking right at Whitney)
Sign this? 
WHITNEY
(looking at her idol)
You, for you.
FIONA
(Smiling grasping the letter to her chest)
For Me? Thank you.

Whitney freaks as Josh, who has caught all of this on tape maneuvers over to the left for a better shot. Whitney leaves the mob to find her brother. She finds him and all is well, but not over. Josh reacts with lightning quick reflexes. He gets the other copy of the letter and awaits Fiona's attention. The camera has not stopped filming the songwriter. Finally, she makes her way towards Josh and the un wanted camera.

Josh hands Fiona the letter, which says to Fiona Apple and Paul Thomas Anderson written on it. 
FIONA
(looking down at the letter, maybe a little deja voo sitting in. She just saw this letter? didn't she?)
You want me to sign this... Or...
JOSH
(about to faint)
Yea, just sign it. 
Now is the moment of silence, uncomfortable silence. What to say, What to say? All he wants to say is in the letter, but what now?
JOSH
(shaking and pointing the camera directly on Fiona)
There's a lot about Paul in there too, so if you could... I don't know... uh
Josh wants to convey that it would be great if her boyfriend could hear what the letter has to say.
FIONA
(still nervous, shy, but grateful, looks down at both envelopes in her hands, puzzled, then finally)
Oh, ok.
Fiona didn't say thanks, but neither did Josh. THEY WERE BOTH ABOUT TO FAINT? :)  of course not, Josh was too nervous.
Josh
(NERVOUS)
Thank for playing The Way it was.
DOPE!! Josh mispronounced the great song The Way Things Are, which he loved hearing her play at the concert. BUT Fiona was already onto her next signing, and did not hear Josh's mistake.
FIONA looks straight into the camera, looks away, looks straight into the camera again for a double take. The look of disgust and worry was all over her face. Fiona whispers to the deaf guard, until finally the second time he gets the message. 
GUARD
(to Josh)
Hay... 
(Motions to put the camera away)
SO Josh and Whitney leave with a great concert, an autograph, a video of the whole backstage experience, and a night they would never forget. 
Thank you Fiona Apple
THey almost fainted.
THe END

Well, as you can see the story rocks, and I would not change it for the world. Or would I? I have not stopped thinking about what I should have done since that moment in time. 
The letter was 3 pages long and had Josh's address, telephone number and e-mail address. I will keep you informed if I hear from Fiona or Paul. Thanks for reading!

Email me at Yodafool@yahoo